Dear You

mexican hat

The thought of driving in the city stresses me, so all day Wednesday was spent telling myself I’m perfectly capable of doing it safely, that it’s not a 24-lane freeway, that it’s not like I’ve never lived and driven in the city, and driven like a bat out of hell too, and so on. I thought I was pretty calm about it, but there must have been underlying anxiety because I was still lying awake well past two o’clock in the morning, which no doubt didn’t help me cope the next day after I had to get up at seven.

I picked Emil up at 8:00 and off we went. The highway driving was a dream: gorgeous sunny day, dry roads. Two hours later we were at the outskirts, the traffic had picked up, and I turned off the music and asked Emil to be quiet. I needed all my faculties to pay attention to the road and the lights and other vehicles.

Just my luck his first appointment was right downtown where traffic is heavily congested. I dropped him off to wait for me in front of the Avord Tower and drove around the block a couple times till a parking spot came open. By the time I rejoined him and we found our way to the cardiologist’s office on the ninth floor, I thought the worst was probably over now that I’d made it this far. Still, as I sat waiting for Emil to come out after his heart tests, I felt like a panic attack was coming on. It’s been a long time since I’ve had one of those, but I remembered what to do: breathe slow, breathe deep, keep on breathing slowly and deeply. It worked.

A quick consult with the doctor after Emil’s test made it clear that there is no heart problem and this was a trip we didn’t really need to make. Aaaak! Oh well, better safe than sorry. We’d managed to arrange to have his AFOs (fiberglas “braces” that support his ankles) repaired the same day, so it wasn’t a wasted trip. Back over the University Bridge we went (fortunately I remembered to shoulder check before changing lanes, thus avoiding a crash), and on Preston Avenue realized I don’t remember how four-way stops work. Is it counter-clockwise you go? You see, one forgets these things when they aren’t necessary where you live. It’s not just like riding a bicycle. Thank God there were no traffic circles to navigate.

After the AFOs were fixed we got into the car to drive home. “Don’t talk to me till we’re out of the city,” I told Emil. “I’m cranky as hell.” I was, too, till we’d escaped.

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Kathy Needs Tech Help Too

Can anyone tell me how to make my Documents folder icon stay on the task bar at the bottom of my screen? I get it there by clicking on Pin to Quick Access after I’ve searched for Documents and all the folders have come up and I’ve selected Documents, and it’ll go to the task bar for a while but it won’t stay, which isn’t handy. I haven’t managed to find an answer for this on Google, which doesn’t seem to understand my question.

This is the Windows version of First World Problems.

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This morning was spent at my desk, working on a proofreading project. When I went out to the kitchen to make a tomato sandwich for lunch, I realized we’re out of bread. That means I have to go to town because I don’t feel like starting a batch now. Plus, tomato sandwiches don’t really suit homemade 100% whole wheat bread, which is too filling, too heavy, too overwhelming, and we’re big into toasted tomato sandwiches these days. And we both might die if we couldn’t have toast for breakfast.

Everett’s just texted that farm eggs have been dropped off for me, so I’ll get those too. Not that I’m in the mood to go anywhere. Yesterday was enough; I long for a down day all day! Plus it’s cold out again. I think. it looks cold and the wind’s howling. I’d rather hibernate.

Emil’s staying at his home in town this weekend because they’ve got “Arts Council,” which is what he calls concerts put on by the arts council, and he doesn’t like to miss those. I have no plans other than to maybe make some cookies for Scott to take to the field. The boys (okay, men) are combining.

What I’d really like to do is lie down for a nap; I could, and go to town later — the store’s open till nine, it’s not like I have to rush. But afternoon naps don’t suit me, much as my body’s requesting one. I tend to wake up feeling tired. The wind in my face and a drive to town will perk me up. I’ll rest later, after four trips between car and house with groceries leaves me feeling sorry for myself.

What are you up to this weekend?


7 thoughts on “Dear You

  1. Well, i could rival you with feeling sorry for myself lately, but i’ll spare you the details…. you probably know them all anyway…..ugh

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can relate vicariously to your trip to the city. I haven’t been to Atlanta unless I had a ride. That feeling of being boxed in while going 75 mph is unnerving. I think you deserve a day to unwind.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I don’t know how you climb inside my mind, some sorcery or witchcraft there m’dear. I’m still (barely) good with driving challenges those 16 lane highways in TO seem embedded in what’s left of my driving brain but the indecisiveness about leaving the home for essentials drives me mad at times. I try to come up with rewards. Like a 4 year old. (I’ll treat you to a visit of the yarn shop if you go out and get the eggs) – glad I’m not alone. :D

    Liked by 1 person

  4. A few months back I had to take my daughter to se her genetist. I was very stressed out by the drive. I would not have made it without my GPS. Even then I got lost.

    I am very glad Emil’s test came back and there is nothing to worry about on that front.

    Naps are always a good thing.

    I am supposed to vote today for a municipal election. Meh. I have never not voted and this is this first time where I just don’t care.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I haven’t driven in Toronto for over twenty years! I doubt I would like doing it now! I do drive around a much smaller city with no issues, and can handle the 401 Highway, although I don’t enjoy that.

    I am canning this weekend, green tomatoes just in after a frost, so it is Green Tomato Mincemeat and Green Tomato Sweet Relish. Yard work too, garden is done, cleaning it all up now.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Go to Control Panel click on Libaries. Scroll to Document folder right click and a meny box pops up click “Pin to Start”. That “might” work for you, it always does for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. LOL Excuse spelling errors in earlier message.
    Easy way–click on the Folders icon then Right Click, a menu box will appear – click “Pin to Start”. Should be right at the top at 3rd or 4th line.

    I also hate driving into the city. Tulsa traffic is horrible and we drive fast here. Posted limit 65mph and if you aren’t doing at least 75 they are tailgating and honking. I have found some side streets that help me avoid the congested corriders. My dread is someone will hit my car which I prize above all things (material wise) so that’s why I white-knuckle drive.

    Liked by 1 person

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